01/18/2021:

I chatted with Julie, then called her today. I thought when we texted the other day she'd invited me to come visit her in April, for Easter. It turns out I read what I wanted to see. She actually said she's coming to Cleveland for Easter in April. She signed up for a race with Jen. Hopefully the pandemic will be more under control by then.  

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I applied for a student loan deferrment today. The most recent stimulus extension expires at the end of January, and I will not be able to afford reinstatement. I put the form in the mail on our evening walk.

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The woman connected with Tech Elevator who is supposed to help us with support services popped onto one of our meetings today. She had emailed everyone at the end of the year suggesting we contact someone at OMJ for further support. She said the same again today, indicating there is funding available for this cohort specifically, and gave us contact information so I reached out. 

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We talked about Imposter Syndrome in class today. I identify with almost all of the 5 types:

Perfectionist: never satisfied and always feel my work could be better. "There's always room for improvement" is not the same as "never good enough" which is how I frequently feel. I've been accused more than once of fixating on flaws and diminishing achievements.

Superhero: feelings of inadequacy compells me to put in more work than others, or rather to just keep banging my head until I figure things out. 

Expert: always trying to learn more and never satisfied with my level of understanding, again undervalueing achievements and expertise. 

Natural Genius: Frustrated and disappointed when I don't succeed on my first try, as if I was supposed to already know something I'm trying to learn. 

Soloist: Self-worth stems from productivity. I don't see asking for help as a sign of weakness, but I don't like to ask for help if I feel I haven't tried everything first, and I can usually think of something else I haven't tried.  

I track daily achievements, but that is more productivity than success. 

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I realized today I haven't done any of the reading for the last 2 chapters. I'm starting to slip and fall behind, which will not work here. 

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I had my 1:1 with Gregor today, and mentioned I'm annoyed with myself for letting Jason and Rahul get into my head, that I suffer from Imposter Syndrome. He told me I shouldn't feel that way because I definintely belong in the bootcamp, that my code is good and I'm a good student (not exactly what he said, but he said nice things meant to reassure me, and I believed him.)

He also looked at my D&D Random Character Generator code and said he'd think about how best to help me organize it.

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Retail Therapy:

bathrobes for Athena, so she doesn't have to stand wet after her shower, while I'm showering

Ear plugs for sleeping when they are cleaning the Costco parking lot at 2am

Pig ears, because Athena is spoiled

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A better pic of Athena's new winter coat

I love snow on branches

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Successes:

Completed database creation homework

Worked with John Savage to complete pairs database creation homework

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Accomplishments:

Catch up on blogging
Dishes
Clean kitchen countertops and stove
Sweep kitchen

Change bedroom sheets

Wash Sheets

Stretch
19K+ steps