9/2/19 - Nothing

There is nothing more to say
The flame
the shame
the pain won't go away

My heart breaks every day we are apart
though it's been months
every day I still find
my heart shattered into shards
that slice and stick and stab
and I bleed

You don't love me
you don't need me
you don't want me
you don't see me the way you once did

Even though I hid
nothing

Even though I gave you
everything

I don't see how we can ever be
anything
again

I don't see how we can ever be
together
again
or even friends

Every day I regret the mistakes I made
every way I could see to take them away
I ruminate

For your love I would wait
weeks, months, years
if I thought you would change
your thoughts and your fears
but you won't.

Once, you lay beside me
once, you stood behind me
once, your arms were around me
once life and love were happy

Once you loved me
once you wanted me
once you liked me
Now you haunt me

And there is nothing I can say
to change the way you feel today